Ready for my embarrassing, yet utterly hilarious story from today?

So, I decided it’d be nice to pick up some “Christmas Cheer” on our way home from shopping… sit by the fire tonight once the kids are in bed, with the twinkle of Christmas lights on the new-fallen snow… a perfect evening planned.

It’s a lazy Saturday and I didn’t really “dress nice” or anything… just a track suit, and unshaven face. The snow also came on pretty suddenly (literally overnight), and I haven’t found my winter boots yet since our move in August. Keep all these details in mind. Scruffy looking dude, wearing a track suit with a junky jacket on top, and wearing running shoes in this blustery winter weather.

I’m generally an outgoing person, and I like to make people smile just by being friendly and a little bit charming.

I enter the LCBO up on Bayfield Street, and there’s a lady giving Whiskey samples up at the front. Turn on the charm, I say to her “Boy, am I glad to see you!”, a bit of a joke about her handing out samples of whiskey.

Now, that would have been fine.

BUT…

As the words came out of my mouth, my shoes (yes, running shoes, on this wintery day) slipped as I entered the store. I stumbled, and slammed into the posts that you’re supposed to gracefully spin trough on your way in.

Trying not to lose my cool, I proceeded to walk over to her table, still slipping a little.

She looked at me … and it was clear she was judging me.

OH MY GOSH, I realized; “She thinks I’m DRUNK”. GASP!

She proceeded to pour me a sample, and no word of a lie: 1.5… maybe 2mL in the bottom of the glass! She didn’t want to give me a sample! She literally thought I was entering the store drunk! LOL!

I can’t say I blame her! In walks scruffy guy. “Boy, am I ever glad to see you!”. Trip. Slam into pole. Stumble over. Drink 1.5 mL of Whiskey.

MY GOODNESS, that was about as embarrassed as I’ve ever been (when I realized what she was thinking), and I have no doubt in my mind she has since told people about this “drunk guy” who visited her tonight. My word!

Well, for the record, the whiskey was nice (all 1.5mL of it). I might have bought some if I didn’t feel it important to quickly get away from that table as fast as I could!

ALL TRUE!